Day 39 of 365 Grateful Days Project:

"I'm grateful to have attended my first Balinese wedding."

Kadek and Kadek

I've been wanting to photograph Balinese wedding. For both the experience and the photography portfolio. I've offered this free photography Balinese wedding service in my Facebook page for a while but only a few days ago I could finally complete the wish. Kadek, one of Fabio's domestic helpers, got married to her long time boyfriend, Kadek. Yes, they are both named Kadek. :)

I wanted to be there by the time the ceremony was performed, which according to the bride would take place at 3 or 4 PM. So my sister and I left at around 1.30 to Klungkung, the groom's village. Only half way to Klungkung it started raining very hard and we had to pull over and put on the raincoat. We arrived there at about 2.30, where the ceremony JUST ended. Apparently they held it earlier than planned and it really didn't matter that the guests who lived far away weren't informed. Another funny thing was that in the wedding invitation it was stated that the event started at 5 PM. So this means I still have to attend another Balinese wedding ceremony to get the real portfolio done.

However, I liked some of the photos. It was a very modest wedding. The only people wearing makeup and fancy kebayas were the bride and the groom. Others were wearing white ceremonial kebayas and nothing else artificial. People were relaxed and they threw jokes most of the times. I liked attending weddings like this, when every one was actually happy and not stressed out. (Trust me, a lot of weddings display too stressed, unhappy bride and some others are so business-like) So the following are some pictures I shot during the wedding.

Decoration outside the gate, made of Janur (palm leaves)

Kadek, the Bride

Kadek, the groom - tired from the long procession

Snacks, given to guests as soon as they arrived

Dogs celebrated the wedding, too

Left: Kadek and Gede, a shy boy who didn't want to have his picture taken.
Right: Decoration from Janur

Finally got Gede's face when he slipped

My sister and a black Balinese dog that reminded her of Zwartje. Except that this one bit her on the neck!

All in all, it was a truly fine wedding.

365 grateful days project Bali Culture photography

2:20 pm

Day 33 of 365 grateful days project:

"I'm grateful that Vincent was alright after the nasty fight last night at the African party."

I don't know why, every time I thought I was finally enjoying a party, it always ended bad.

Last night was the White Party - an annual event held by the owner of Animale clothing line. Someone said that this was always such a great jet set party in Bali that you must simply come when invited. Vincent was invited since lately he's become friends with a new poker group; and the whole member of this poker group was invited.

So we went there after hours looking for "nicer" white outfits for both Vincent and me. We both have A LOT OF white clothes as we both love white. But every white thing we have is so Bali-style. Nothing fancy about them. So we were looking for the better looking white clothes after my rendezvous with Michelle.

Again, it was full of French. But this time it was totally different. This group of French somehow speaks more English than French; perhaps because half of the invitees are of different nationalities or perhaps because the wife of the host is Indonesian. So I really enjoyed it.

This one particular woman who speaks excellent English (perhaps better than Indonesian) was very interesting and we clicked in everything we discussed. Her previous husband was English and she found so many different experience when she finally settled down with a Frenchman. Somehow, I could relate to that. :-)

And guess who I met there and in every party I attended? AYU! My ex workmate at IALF. The party animal 4 years back and still. I met her at La Plancha party the week before and there she was again at the White Party. When I asked her which one of the host who invited her, she said, "Oh, my girl friend is friends with the wife of the host; I'm just tagging along." Hehehe... I can't remember the last time I came to a party whose host I didn't know. Well, I didn't know this one either; but I came as the capacity of Vincent's spouse. Anyway, it was good that Ayu was there because it kept me from feeling misplaced. And she brought a camera which she and her friends kept snapping. This is one she tagged me on Facebook.

(I wonder why I always write so much before the real subject of the blog)
Anyway, by midnight I got bored, and so was this sweet girl called Tini. No, she's not Indonesian. So after the empty promises her boyfriend and MY boyfriend had given that we would leave very soon (NOT), Tini and I took off on our own to the African Party at Batu Belig beach. I had a wonderful time the first 30 minutes I got there with Tiny. But after that I had a physical breakdown since I was up so early in the morning as usual and kept moving until then (around 1 o'clock). I went upstairs and fell asleep under the open sky. YEAH, only Carla can sleep at parties surrounded by LOUD music and strong sea winds!!!

Vincent and his boys didn't arrive until about 2.30. And that was because one of the boys was beaten up by some drunk Aussies. So they came as quickly as they could to give support. Only 15 minutes after he found me, there was another fight going on (apparently there were 2 other fights before that perhaps happening when I was asleep). So I was saying to Vincent who was standing next to me, "Boys are so stupid. Why...."

Apparently he was no longer beside me!!! I was looking around and found him IN THE MIDDLE of the fight with Anael! How could he move so fast?!?!

But my concern that he was there changed to worry when someone broke a beer bottle and hit someone else's head. It seemed to me that Vincent was trying to stop the fight. But really, for drunk jackasses (both from the Australian group and the French group), how could you really see that? Especially with the uniform clothes the French's are wearing after the white party, it was so easy to locate enemies, right? Even if you meant to stop it. Then I saw someone grab a beach chair and throw it to someone else. I was terrified.

The rest involved many bottle beers flying about, white clothes stained red from blood, wounded heads full of blood... I didn't care about everyone else. My eyes were locked to Vincent.

In the end, he fortunately didn't get wounded. Not even a stain of other people's blood. But I stomped when I could finally express my feeling and I insisted to go home immediately. Anael came to me and apologized it happened (I didn't even understand why he apologized) and he tried to defend Vincent for being there. He said that he just wanted to stop it and not join the fight. Bladibladibla.... But I just wanted him to be safely home. Vincent kept saying that he was not fighting and obviously I didn't understand where he was coming from.

Guess what, he was right. I don't care where he was coming from but I do care when he's hurt! Even if he constantly fought when he was young, it is a different case now that I'm with him. I want nothing to happen to him ever and he'd better listen to me!

BOYS!!!!

365 grateful days project Bali Culture social life

8:33 am

I attended the first Melasti ceremony back in 2008 during my first year in Bali (or second for I was moving here in August 2007). But it was a little bit different from the Melasti this year. 3 years ago I came just a little bit too late, at the closing of the ceremony when sunset was already approaching and there was only happy, happy celebration. This year I witnessed so much more.

I went to Petitenget beach, the closest temple from my place which was about 2 minutes ride by scooter. That was as soon as I read somebody's status on Facebook, saying that the roads were closed almost everywhere due to the parades. I could also hear the continuous Balinese gamelan in the distance. So I just took a quick shower and grabbed my camera and went there.

I couldn't even park near the temple. So I parked next to some hotel and walked to the beach temple. Guess what? There was even a big jam walking. As usual, people wouldn't give way to the others and various vehicles were stuck in the middle of the roads facing all directions. The Pecalang got a bit pissed and started being rude to the street users, including those who walked.

Anyway, the source of the madness was not that far away from there. I could immediately see the beautiful colourful parades consisting of Balinese Hindus, young and old, most of whom were wearing sunglasses due to the bright sun.

The parades

I struggled to get to the beach among the thousands of people there. And when I was finally there, I couldn't get enough of so many photo opportunities. I also felt this strange feeling about the ceremony. A mixture of amazed and scared at the so many people, men and women, being in the state of trance. It is believed that during this purification ceremony (Melasti), the Gods are coming down to earth and possessing some of the bodies of the followers. From what I saw, most that took the girls made them scream and run towards the sea, sometimes dancing or crying. Some of her friends and relatives would follow her bringing holy water for her and then praying for her until she came back to normal.

Girl having trance

Th men were either having the same act like the girls, or more often having Ngurek, the act of stabbing themselves with a keris, traditional knife, as they were taken by the Gods or spirits. It is also believed that since they are in trance and another power is taking over the body, it gives them more power so that the keris stabbed into the body will not hurt them. Like they were immuned from that. I met my next door neighbour, Anders, an hour later and we discussed if it was for real. And I decided that it might be real stabbing since I could see holes in the places they stabbed themselves in their white shirts.

Man in trance stabbing his head with 2 keris.

Man in trance stabbing his chest with a keris.

Man in trance stabbing his chest with a keris.

Man in trance trying to stab himself with a keris.
The others were anticipating this act.

Even though it could sound and look depressing to see this ceremony, the real treat was from the children brought to the ceremony. They seemed to be so smiley and happy (probably due to the day off from school). The younger children would cry as their parents wash their face with the sea water. But the older ones were so eager to participate in the happening. Like these flag boys.

Balinese boys carrying flags that symbolize different Gods

Melasti was really one of the most interesting ceremonies and cultures in Bali that one wouldn't want to miss out. I missed the last 2 Melasti ceremonies because I had to work. So I felt pretty blessed that now I worked for myself and that I could manage my own time.

:)

Bali Culture

8:30 am

As much as the Frenchs are so much fun when they want to speak English (or at least try), they are the most boring community when they don't. Unfortunately the latter is more likely to happen.

And I thought that the gatherings with Vincent's friends have been boring. But really... now that David left last week and Fred is leaving too next week, I imagine I won't be really looking forward to the future outings now. I can only think of Laurence who probably wants to speak to me - as in having a real conversation more than just "ça va? Oui, et toi?"

Vincent doesn't look very happy either with the fact that his two nicest friends are leaving.

Sucks.

Culture friends

2:45 pm

The offering with a burning incense.

Last Saturday was Tumpak Landep day. That was the birthday of all vehicles and machinaries in Bali. Balinese prayed and put "sesajen" or offering on their motorbikes, cars and even sewing machines and scissors.

I went out to meet Aliki - Vincent's friend's wife - and I saw the maid next door was making a little ceremony with all the motorbikes in the shared parking lot. I asked her to decorate my motorbike too, and this is what her husband had to say to me, "Not decorate; it's to pray for it."

Oops, well okay, but the offering looked charming, so the insensible me just spurt out the first vocab that applied to it that came to my mind. So yes, it was my fault.

Anyway, I should have asked earlier, they said, because it needed to be prayed in the temple before. But to make me happy, they slipped one pack of offering between the bike and my license plate, splashed some fragranced water on to it, then on to my face.

"Okay, you are safe now," they both said. Then they looked at Vincent's motorbike and they splashed the water too there. "This one, too. Now everybody is safe."

Oh, one of the things I love about Bali.

Bali Culture religion

8:15 am

mood: buzzzzzy!
listening to: the interview with Sarah Sanyahumbi

---

I can't seem to relax in the evenings these days. There is always something going on outside that I feel necessary to get my butt off the bed, grab my camera and take pictures of the various events that are happening!

Do I sound like complaining?

Well I am not. :D

Right, so yesterday I went out of the office at exactly 5:30 to do some photo hunting for Melasti. This is a ceremony held by the Hindu people two days before Nyepi holiday (Silence Day), which would occur on the 7th of March. Since I myself will be escaping Bali on that day to Kuta Lombok -- because just like what the name implies, everyone has to be silent and not make any noises on that day; no fire (electricity, which means we will be in the dark once the sun sets); and no activities/works being done. If you break this cultural rule, the pecalang will get you a cultural sanction - I don't know what it is, but any sanctions will not be nice, will it? SO that's why I'm going to escape that day and have a long weekend in Kuta Lombok. As many of my friends, latest one was Rocky, have promoted its sheer beauty and all.

I can live without lights, but I can't live without sounds. :P

That means I will surely miss the Ogoh-Ogoh festival, which will be held the night before Nyepi. My friends, including Pam and Carol, are looking forward to it. They say it's a big festival that happens only once a year. And honestly I would like to see it, too. But I really can't bear to be in Bali the next day, really.
That gave me a reason to no way miss this Melasti ceremony.

Although I did almost miss it.

I went to 66 beach, as Carol wanted it, to finally be there and wait for about half an hour and get a text message from her that she didn't feel like going (doh! these Indonesian promises are really not to be accounted for!), and nothing was going on! I was like... where is the famous ceremony they have been telling me about?

After a while I decided to go back to my boarding house, find my landlord and ask him where it should take place. He told me it was in Kuta beach in front of the Hard Rock Hotel. I threw away my lunch box and notebook and sped my bike to THAT beach (which is actually nearer from my place than 66).

On the way there I saw a lot of people walking back from the beach on Poppies I lane and my heart sank and it was full of these negative thoughts that I'd already missed it. But, no! Luckily.

Arriving at the beach there were sooooooo many people in whites (like hundreds of them, and these come from only Kuta!). I was amazed....






I saw them throw an alive swan into the sea as a symbol of offering to the gods. Some visitors were screaming surprised and felt a pity for the poor animal to be thrown back and forth a few times. It didn't die of course, for it always swam back to the shore. But still, to see that with your own eyes...
Some gamelan music was played in the background and some people were praying, some others were burning incense.

After that a woman in a white kebaya came forward, put her offering by the shore, and broke an egg onto the basket. I was told that it was a symbol that the ceremony was over (see??? I was late!) and that it was time for them to walk on the parade.



Then I saw these really, really cute girls with thick makeup ala Balinese in yellow-dominated Balinese traditional kebaya. Later on in my boarding house, my landlord's son told me that earlier on (before I got there) the girls were performing a sacred, ritual dance called Rejang dance. *grumbles again*



Anyway, not long after that, the people were moving to the outer direction of Kuta beach (Jalan Pantai Kuta's gate, near The Wave club) and marching towards the Hindu temple near Kuta traditional market. These are the pictures I took of the parade, or what the Balinese called "Pepedan":




Info: The people here were holding a looooong white sheet, which was a symbol of the way to the throne of the gods. That is to say that the people support the gods.


The gamelan guys. Look at the very left one. Doesn't he look sweet? Lately I developed an opinion that Balinese men are not too bad to look at. But got a completely different opinion for the women, though. At least generally..

That's it. Not as many pictures as I took in Ngaben ceremony last weekend, but better than nothing. And I certainly "disturbed" a hell lot of people (again) to explain me about all the things I was curious about. Why they were doing this and that and all. Like this one last fact that Melasti is held before Nyepi because on Nyepi itself the Hindus can't really do the proper praying for they have to sort of meditate and get closer to the gods in a silent way. Some of them, especially the priests, fast like the Moslems do on Ramadhan. But it is not an obligatory thing to do.

Isn't this a beautiful culture? I feel so lucky to be here, live here, and to witness all these different things where in Java, for example, you will never get a second thought of what Nyepi really is.

Bali Culture

5:27 pm

mood: super tired
listening to: Morcheeba
watching: The Road to Guantanamo

---

I think I will make a quite good journalist.

One of the neighbours of my landlord died on the 29th of February. She was still young, aged 25, suffered for three years of tumor. Name was Ni Putu Wiwin Mulyatini.

Ayu, the daughter in law of Bu Tunas (my landlady) offered me to go with her to this event and she told me that I should be wearing a piece of Balinese clothing wrapped around my hips.

On the due day, however, I was busy talking to Ella on the phone and I missed her by about 15 minutes [darn it!]. But nevertheless I tried to locate the ceremonial walk, which took place near my boarding house.

I ran when I saw it, but the parade was long. I lost my breath several times but I finally could catch up with them with the cost of injuring my foot with the new sandals I was wearing.


The parade on Jalan Legian.


The music guys with Balinese gamelan.

We arrived at Kuta beach (I couldn't believe they made me walk that far in order to reach this familiar spot of Kuta beach near The Wave!) at around 1:30 and they started cremating the body.


Arriving at Kuta beach.

First, the dead woman was given the last respect from families and friends (they splashed some sprinkle of water and put some sesajen or offering to the coffin). Then she was covered by typical Balinese bright yellow fabric. The head side and the feet side were connected with two LPG gas tube, and.... the fire was lighted.


Don't freak out. This was her, before cremated. Remember that she'd been ill for three years and she had only skin over bones because of the disease she was having.


And this was her when she was healthy. Poor girl. She was beautiful.




Can you see the black round spot inside this thing? It was supposed to be her head.

It took so long for them to cremate the body. Like one or two hours, and it was done with the gas! Not with the traditional wood. I walked around in the mean time, sat down occasionally with some Balinese ladies who were chatting and gossiping cheerfully, asked a lot of question to them regarding to this Ngaben ceremony. And from what I gathered, the ceremony I attended was of the middle-class family. So it was not too big, it was not too small. This medium level of Ngaben would cost around Rp 30 Million (3,000 euro). I was bewildered.
"You must be kidding me?" I said. "I would have used that amount of money for my wedding."
She said, "Well this is only a funeral. Balinese weddings would cost around Rp 80 to 100 Million."
I was rather shocked, I must say.

I met a Frenchman who was busy taking pictures and talking to people with his (both) broken Indonesian and English. Apparently that was his 7th Ngaben ceremony and he said that it was the best Ngaben he'd ever seen. I asked him why. He told me because the previous Ngabens were conducted by poorer families. And this one seemed to have more money. More question from my side: what made this one different?
"Well, you know, the colours and quality of clothing the people are wearing; the priests, there are two priests here that's amazing! And the way they did the cremation. This is just awesome."

I guess I was lucky then. Only in my first 6 months in Bali I'd already seen a very beautiful Ngaben ceremony. Even Fabio and Inga had never seen it. And they have lived here for 3 years.

After a long, waiting period of the cremation process, the people gathered again to collect the rest unburnt bones of the woman, put them in the bright yellow piece of fabric, folded it and decorated it beautifully.


The people decorating the ash and bones.


A priest on a small stage was praying for the spirit of the woman, purifying it.


Another priest at the beach to prepare her spirit before spreading the ash and bones to the sea.

I stumbled across the other priest who was left alone on the other side of the beach nearby, accompanied by only four women around him. I asked the women a lot of questions and they answered very descriptively. When the priest finished praying, he joined the conversation and explained to me that the two priests there had different roles. The one on the stage was to purify the spirit of the dead woman. He himself was to prepare her spirit to be given to the sea.

Which would happen in a short while.

When the priest on the stage finished praying, suddenly a flock of people came towards us and sat down near (behind) the priest I was talking to. Then this priest in the white robes started to lead the ceremony to prepare the spirit to travel to the sea.


They then stood up (especially the men), took the beautifully decorated thing with the remaining ash and bones of the dead woman, swam to the rather deep part of the sea (of course I didn't go with them!) and every time the big wave came, they would jump up over the wave and threw part by part of the ash and bones.


They then went back to the shore. Their faces happy and smiling. Their byed one another and went to their own homes.

In some traditional tribes in Indonesia, indeed, a funeral is not a thing to cry for. But it is to celebrate for. :)

Bali Culture

6:26 pm